Peripheral Neuropathy Update

It's been a little while since I last shared what's been happening on the Peripheral Neuropathy front so I figured a little update post might be in order, even if only to prove to my own self that the struggle of healing really is still paying off in progress... slow as it seems. Believe me, I do know how far I've come since laying paralyzed in the hospital now that I'm almost through and again back to my body being somewhat strong and able... But sometimes actually having the end of the proverbial tunnel in view just somehow seems to make every forward movement seem to take about as long as foreverrrrr.

I've been working really hard on my physio home exercises and have even been doing well on the rowing machine which is helping me immensely with my standing/walking stability; so much so actually, that even when I am walking outside in the yard or on the driveway, I have been practicing with only one of my walking Stix! But when I mentioned to Enz the other day that I was thinking I might try leaving one of my Stix in the car when we were headed into a store his answer was, "I think you still need two, Gillian..." I felt mixed at his reply to my idea, both hurt and relieved but in my heart I knew he was right, I just wanted the easy way out in letting him be the one to tell me not to rush myself. In all honesty, I had really expected him to be happy and suggest I try leaving both in the car but I'm thankful he didn't because it really got me thinking about the preparation I still need to work on in order to again start living without the help of my Stix...

Sure, I feel strong and I know for a fact that I am again pretty solid on solid and even footing but I also know that it is still a really big struggle for me to make it up and down the hills at camp even with both of my SideStix helping me. And I've been practicing so hard on the stairs at home with just one of my Stix and the handrail but as Enz had added into his 'I don't think you're ready speech'... not every store we visit with staired entrances will have a handrail. And what about curbs? And ramps? ...Yes, I am much stronger but I also still have work to do in order to prepare myself to fully take on the challenges of taking on the world once more without Stix.

So today, I gave myself a new home exercise to help me start preparing for getting out and about as a Single-Stix-Chick... stairs with one Stix and NO holding onto the handrail.... and though it wasn't easy, it was a start!

The video is almost 2 minutes long so I totally won't be insulted if you don't want to take that much time to watch but it was pretty big for me. I am certain that before long I will be running hands-free up and down but for now I am pretty pumped with this small feat of confidence... especially since less than a year ago, the only way I could get up and down these stairs was by crawling on my hands and knees! So, today, I tried really hard to make it up and down using only one Stix while also trying to not let myself touch the handrail, except at the turn-around part out of sheer fear mixed with safety necessity.  ;)

Please go easy when judging my still chubbiness... it's not as easy to lose the weight when not able to move so well or quickly; I'm still working really hard on that part, too!!

Sometimes it's really hard not to just rush forward when the end goal just looks sooooo darned close... but I think it just means that the finish line is going to be that much sweeter when finally we meet!